BYJ: Day 32 – Celebrate Your Birth Day

Today, I woke up and did some things for my job (I’m feeling frustrated with that at the moment…sigh), then I sat down and read the next section in the book I’ve been reading on how to make changes to be a more Beautiful You.  The author discusses how, on one birthday. she sat down and made a list of things she wants to do in the coming year.  She happened to make a list of one item per year of life. She went on to explain that she listed anything she could think of – little things, major things, things for herself, things she wanted to learn, or whatever.  She looks at this list as her reason to live for herself (Although, I think that might be my interpretation…I don’t have the book right in front of me to reference it accurately) and began doing things she never did before.

She also explains that she has never completed the list she makes each year, but she does grow from the experiences she has from these items. The author explains that her confidence grew and that she felt life was more fulfilled.  She goes on to explain that the end of the year, she reviews what she has done and relives the memories and experiences and reflects on their significance to her.

Then she instructs the readers to make their own list…

I shut the book, but it away, folded my arms across my chest and practically pouted. “I can’t do anything…” came the negative thought, almost instantly. “When am I ever going to be able to do anything I want…” was the next thought. “But I want to do something…” a slight feeling of hope had entered; only to be followed by, “Everything I want to do costs too much”. And the worst one, I think, “I’ll feel like an idiot trying anything..,”.

Then I jumped out of my seat, jumped up and down and said to myself, “Why do you do this?!?!  Why do you refuse to do anything…? What is so wrong with your desires for life?”  And then I remembered, “Because you’re afraid to be happy…”

I am… I’m afraid to be happy and I don’t know why.

The author suggests making a list for each year you have been alive – for example, if your nest birthday, you turn 103, then you should have 103 items in your list.  She says, cut the list in half, if your birthday is at least 6 months away.  If it’s less than six months away, she said to make a quarter list or a third of the list.

So, here I am, making my list…and it may seem silly, but this took some real effort. I gritted my teeth, my hands were tight, my head began to hurt, as I thought about what I might like. But I’m going to make the list for my entire next birthday (ugh…and it makes me feel kinda old).

  1. Take a yoga class
  2. Learn to dance
  3. Learn rock climbing
  4. Continue hiking 14ers in Colorado
  5. wax the hair off my body
  6. Get a tattoo (I have 4, currently)
  7. Learn to play an instrument.
  8. Start running
  9. Visit a couple of national parks
  10. Take a trip back to Europe
  11. Begin seeing a therapist again
  12. I really do want to stop drinking (I’m not getting drunk, but I’m not completely sober either.)
  13. Volunteer my time someplace…just not sure where
  14. Buy a dress
  15. Learn to paint
  16. Reconcile myself to divorce
  17. Find a better job
  18. Learn to fish
  19. I get manicures and pedicures, but I’d like to have my nails painted
  20. Confide in someone in my real life, my sexuality
  21. Take a class on nutrition
  22. Read some piece of classic literature
  23. Attend a fashion show
  24. Visit Las Vegas
  25. See the Canadian Rockies
  26. Go out on a Friday night and meet people (aaaaggghhhhh…the thought causes me anxiety)
  27. Find spirituality
  28. Make a clay sculpture
  29. Learn to draw
  30. Drink more water (I feel dehydrated today…blech)
  31. Get a massage
  32. Give a massage
  33. Make a new friend
  34. Attend a concert
  35. Climb the Manitou Incline
  36. Try writing a short story (Meg suggested I try it, but I’m self-conscious of my writing ability)
  37. Get my palm read
  38. Learn to cook something new
  39. Consider making a love-connection (In all seriousness, until I’m divorced, this won’t happen)
  40. Ask my mom to teach me to crochet (I’ve always liked the blankets she makes)
  41. Try and reconcile with my sister
  42. Learn Spanish or some other language
  43. De-clutter (Seriously, I got things I no longer need)
  44. Try on a wig
  45. Not give up on life!

Okay, there you have it, there’s my list of things I’d like to do before I turn 46…


29 thoughts on “BYJ: Day 32 – Celebrate Your Birth Day”

  1. None of that seems unreasonable. Most is not real pricey, with the exception of no.’s 10 and 11….and no. 16 could be, of course. And, you say your self-conscious about your writing, but you write here all the time, and about sensitive subjects. I assume you get positive feedback here, and I assume you would if you wrote fiction here too. Now that you have a list, get it on. Just pick the easiest one and do it. Seeing some checked off is good for the psyche. 😃

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love this, T.S. It’s optimistic and life-affirming. I believe we can inspire others just by being our honest, human selves. Your list looks totally do-able 🙂 Many of the activities you can learn how to do via instructional videos on YouTube. I love Yoga With Adrienne. Free!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Reading this post was very inspiring for me. Of course, all of your reasoning for not making the list are the same as mine. I’m soooo excellent at making excuses when it comes to doing something nice for me. I’ve been very down on myself these days, going through a depression of sorts and full of major anxiety while trying to connect with others. So I identify with the negative attitude for today, but Missy I must say, this list is so damn doable. You can start with an easier one on the list and work from there. Therapy will definitely help you put things in perspective and it might behoove you to put that as one of the priorities. Progress is important… not perfection.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love this idea, I’m going to give it a shot. My birthday is in November so using her rule I only have to come up with half, seems doable.
    Good luck to you and keep us posted on each one you accomplish!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. These are all great goals. I think you can do them. Of course they take time and intention but every day, you can resolve to spend thirty minutes working on one item from your list. Creative writing is cathartic and you don’t have to share it with anyone until you are ready. You can achieve these goals and I am going to help you.
    Let’s start with running together. Virtual running buddies. We’ll start on Monday, okay? So get your sneakers, get a good running bra if you don’t have one already and on Monday, we’re doing our first run-walk. you have the weekend to prepare for it so let me know if you’re up for it.

    Liked by 1 person

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