The Big Bi Elephant in the Room — Sista Magazine

I found this article to be incredibly intriguing and there are some definite things I could relate to feeling that this woman described about bisexual men. Granted, she was discussing it as it related to African American men (my friend kDaddy could probably comment on this better than I could), but it was still powerful to read and I found myself looking back at my own life in coming to terms with my own sexuality. But there are some great connotations here on what’s like to be bisexual…


Bisexuality is often attacked with a lot of huge misconceptions. Funny thing is, bisexuals are even the black sheep of the LGBTQA community. Part of the reason bisexuality gets such a bad rap and why so many are afraid to identify as such is because it’s associated with many negative connotations: 1. Bisexuals are confused. […]

via The Big Bi Elephant in the Room — Sista Magazine


7 thoughts on “The Big Bi Elephant in the Room — Sista Magazine”

  1. He pretty much nailed it. We can accept that our African-American brothers and sisters can be gay (and despite the stereotypes and other senseless hype) but the thought of an African-American bisexual is, publicly, inconceivable while, privately, we know better than that. Yep, even among our people, there’s no such animal as a Black bisexual and there can’t be… and I know many who say this and they’re just as bisexual as I am.

    What we see, what the author saw, is that the stigma and prejudice against bisexuality isn’t contained to race, color, or creed, that the heteronormative mindsets isn’t flexible enough to accept bisexuality; instead, it’s a group act of denial to have someone say that they’re bisexual but everyone tells them that they have to be gay; that narrow-mindedness still kinda irks me but since bisexual’s break all the existing rules, I understand the mindset and, as you know, do all I can to shed more light into that which we really don’t want to see… but something that has been around for a damned long time.

    Obviously, there are Black bisexuals but as long as our society has this negative mindset about bisexuality, things like this stay on the DL even if for one’s own protection and to keep the gay label from being plastered all over them by a society that cannot think in three dimensions where sexuality is concerned.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s crazy that we get so much in denial about this when it’s clear that there are bisexuals of all races; we’ve (Black folks) believed the hype that Blacks are homophobic and the men more than women because our “legendary” sexual prowess so it seems inconceivable that, as Black men, we’d want to turn that prowess at each other as well as the womenfolk.

        And that’s exactly what many of do and many more are very much into while keeping up the farce that we don’t exist and there’s no need for us to exist and if someone says they’re really bisexual, again, it “saves face” by insisting to that person that there’s no way they can be bisexual.

        Really? I know more Black bisexuals than I do any other and I’ve met a lot of bisexuals, male and female. What I find hilarious and sad that when my sexuality has been doubted and I’ve offered to prove that I am what I say I am, um, all of a sudden, they don’t seem to be all that interested in the proof.

        Ya might not believe what I say but I’m thinking you will believe your eyes, huh?

        We have so much growing up yet to do…

        Liked by 2 people

    1. Honestly, I’m not really sure…I’ve never been big on movements and causes. Hell, it took me forever to refer to myself as bisexual, so I can’t really say what queer means…other than a dictionary definition.


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